


Harmony

by LykaonArkadia



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-09-24
Packaged: 2019-07-16 09:32:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16083329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LykaonArkadia/pseuds/LykaonArkadia
Summary: (Pre-Thor movie) Loki struggling to get past the death of the love of his life.Song Inspiration: You Said You’d Grow Old With Me by Michael SchulteWarnings: Violence and death





	Harmony

**Author's Note:**

> Well I have so many other things I should be writing (Positive, Encaged, other requests…) but I was listening to “You Said You’d Grow Old With Me” by Michael Schulte and this story hit me and I had to write it. A majority of this is written leading directly up to the beginning of Thor where they all go to Jotunheim with a different purpose than is canon. It then jumps into post Infinity War. There is a break though where that happens, and if you’d rather not read that I made sure the ending at the break makes sense. I will however say if you want the happier ending, you should read that bit :)

**(Pre Thor 1)**

_“You meddle with things you couldn’t hope to understand,” Laufey spits at the young Asgardians before him. “Now leave this place before you no longer can.”_

_“We’re not leaving empty handed,” Fandral states puffing his chest out and taking a step forward. “It’s going back with us to Asgard.”_

_“You have one last chance to leave this place before we take your Prince’s head,” he states, other frost giants crowding around the group of four Asgardians._

_“Stay behind me,” Y/N hisses pulling her aforementioned betrothed behind her. “I won’t allow that,” she states glaring into the man’s eyes. “We will be leaving.”_

_“But-“ Fandral starts as Y/N shoots him a glare._

_“NOW,” she hisses at the blonde as her hand grabs Loki’s behind her, and they slowly begin to back away. “Nice and easy. Fandrel, Sif, this way. Slowly.”_

_As the group begins to back away, Loki goes to Y/N’s side whispering into her ear angrily, “I CAN defend myself darling.”_

_“I’m in charge of this mission,” she states bluntly taking her eyes off the others to look at him. “A Prince of Asgard won’t die on my mission.”_

_He raises an eyebrow and his mouth twitches into a frown, “Oh is that all?”_

_She sighs and looks at him fondly, “Now isn’t the time love, but you know I couldn’t live without you.”_

_Loki flashes her a quick smile and wink, before the pair turn to see Fandral launching a blade at Laufey’s chest._

_“No!” Y/N shouts, too late, before the blade turns to ice and crumbles in front of the giant, a look of anger on his face. “RUN!” She screams grabbing Loki’s hand as the four take off toward their pickup point._

_“You idiot!” Sif yells to the blonde as they run, narrowly avoiding shards of ice being thrown at them._

_“I had to try!” He insists, a shard grazing the top of his hair, eliciting a yelp from him._

_“No you did not!” Y/N yells back. “HEIMDAL! Take us home! For the love of Odin BRING US HOME!”_

_The rainbow transport appears fifteen feet in front of them as they run, Fandral and Sif racing into it first._

_The frost giants gaining on them, Y/N shoves Loki with all her might into the rainbow lights as a shard impales her chest seconds later._

_The sickening sound reaches Loki’s ears as he hears a bloodcurdling scream; realizing it’s his own. The bifrost grabs ahold of him as he watches Y/N drop to her knees, eyes staring into his, and Laufey behind her. The frost giant also meeting his gaze, pulls an ice dagger across her throat in his last few seconds of sight. Darkness._

Shooting up out of his bed, Loki frantically looks around the room and puts his hand to his racing heart. His room trashed, with debris and empty bottles of alcohol littered across the floor. His mirror across the room smashed, glass covering his desk below it.

His hands go to his eyes as he slowly tries to center himself and ignore the throbbing in his head. Nearly one year later and he still relived that day, every night. The day he lost his betrothed to the frost giants.

Tears drip down his face as he grabs her pillow from the untouched side of the bed and holds it to his chest.

Burying his face in it’s softness, he inhales deeply desperately trying to pick up her ever fading scent on it.

In the year following the failed mission, Loki had spent a majority of his time locked away in their room drinking himself into a stupor. Sleep was few and far between due to flashbacks of that day haunting his dreams.  

Her Y/E/C eyes holding his gaze, her giving up her own life to save him, her blood as that monster ran his blade across her-  _“STOP.”_  He scolds himself trying to shake away the memory.  

Laying back, he places the pillow gently on his face, willing the happier memories to flood his mind.

Meeting her for the first time. Her bright eyes held his attention immediately, and a smile that lit up the room. She held a dagger in one hand, her casual dress torn from an impromptu sparring match with his brother. Small cuts decorated her face and arms, and small droplets of blood ran from the one on her cheek. She met his gaze just as boldly, not looking away like most he turned his gaze to. A quick wink of those bright eyes and he was smitten. Not that he’d have admitted it at that moment.

The day he finally plucked up the courage to invite her out instead of gazing at her from across the room while she talked with his brother and friends. Her smile overtook her features that day, happily agreeing to accompany him on a walk through the nearby woods. What started in stiff conversation and trying to be overly proper, turned into a dagger throwing contest that won him one sweet kiss.

Their dates blended together, going from two, four, ten; to losing track of how many days they actually spent at each other’s side. He, her God of Mischief, and she his Goddess of Harmony. Through her he learned that harmony wasn’t lack of mischief, it was the balance between order and mischief, a perfect symphony of notes that twined together to form their story. Two opposites that balanced one another perfectly.

Balanced perfectly. As their bodies intertwined for the first time, and he uttered the words of love he had held back on the tip of his tongue. Those same bright eyes that stared back at him, hooded in ecstasy but swimming with the same love he felt, as she came undone beneath him, words of love on her lips.

The day his father told him he was to be wed to a woman chosen to be his princess, had nearly broken his heart. It felt like a black hole was opened beneath him as he held on for dear life. A tantrum ensued between Prince and King, only for him to be pulled out by his mother insisting he meet the woman before he decided.

A defiant snarl set on his face as he opened the door to the room his arranged betrothed would be in, and the air was knocked from his lungs to find Y/N sitting on a stool in front of him. A smirk gracing her lips as she held up a hand showcasing a small engagement band.

From that day forward, she retired to their now joint bedroom every evening, falling asleep in his arms after hours of talking about the future. Talks of the wedding and all it’s details and the honeymoon that would follow. Talks of small feet that would one day pad down the halls of the palace. And talks of how they’d grow old together, forever at one another’s side until one was called away to Valhalla to wait for the other to join them.

Life had been bliss. Life had been perfect. Life had been a dream.

Until a nightmare stole it all away in the blink of an eye.

Still laying in bed, a pounding at his door tears him from his thoughts. With a big groan he climbs out of his bed to answer it. “I asked to not be disturbed,” he growls at the servant in front of him.

“Yes your highness,” the man says nervously, “But your father the King has requested your present immediately in the throne room.”

“Why?” He asks narrowing his eyes. “What does he have to say to me that you couldn’t rely?”

“I’m not sure your highness, I’m not to ask,” he responds, his eyes dropping to the floor.

A heavy sigh leaves his lips as he runs a hand through his hair, “Tell father I will be with him momentarily.”

Slamming the door shut behind him, he rummages through his drawers to find something clean and suitable to wear. His normal royal wear long discarded and forgotten on the floor at the end of the bed.

Pulling on the simple tunic and trousers, he swings the door back open and heads down the hall.

“His highness, Prince Loki has arrived!” The announcer shouts as the doors to the throne room open for him.

He grimaces at the loudness of the man, but shakes his head trying to ignore the impending migraine and steps into the room.

Approaching his parents, he immediately notices the look of disgust on his father’s face, and look of worry on his mother’s.

Stopping before them, Odin yells out to the guards to vacate the room, and looks over his son.

“What took you so long to arrive?” He mutters gruffly.

“I was dressing, I just got out of bed father,” he responds quickly.

“And why do you walk the halls of this palace in rags? You’re a Prince, the people should not see you like this,” he continues on.

“It’s what I had clean,” he mutters.

“Loki you dressed yourself magically for years, you expect me to believe that?” Odin growls at him.

“I haven’t been using my magic,” he responds simply.

“Why darling?” Frigga asks gently as his eyes went to her.

“I… I don’t wish to,” he answers, looking away from her gaze.

“You need to quit whatever  _this_ is Loki,” Odin demands slamming a fist onto his throne. “I will not allow you to spend all your days in your room drinking, walking around the palace in rags, your hair greasy and unkempt. You say barely a word to your brother. This needs to stop.”

“You don’t understand,” Loki growls himself, his brows furrowing.

“You go on one mission, and lose one warrior, and it’s the end of the universe as you know it? Y/N knew the risk she took as a warrior every time she set foot on the battlefield, and you need to accept that she died a heroic death and finds her glory in Valhalla,” Odin states firmly.

“She was supposed to be here!” Loki yells, the veins on his neck pressing against his skin. “She shouldn’t be in Valhalla yet, she should be alive and here!”

“She is where fate put her, and you will need to accept this,” Odin says silencing him. “And I have something to help push you onward, you need to think to the future, the future for yourself and this kingdom. Your duty as a Prince.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Loki spits glaring into his father’s eyes. “You would not dare.”

“I have arranged a new marriage for you,” he states.

“Have you gone mad!?” Loki snaps storming up to the throne, Odin standing up to be toe to toe with his son. “How could you even do this? How could you even think for one moment that I would accept?”

“There is no accepting, you have a duty as Prince, son,” Odin says gravely as he crosses his arms.

“I don’t care!” He screams, tears pricking at his eyes. “Don’t you see I don’t care? Leave me and my personal life be!” He turns from the throne and stomps his way out of the room, slamming the doors open as his mother calls after him.

After he’s out of their sight, he breaks into a full sprint toward one of the back entrances of the palace. Flinging those doors open he runs, and runs until he finds himself in the woods the two of them used to walk through together.

Coming to a halt, he leans against a tree as the tears he was holding in finally run down his face.

Looking to the sky, he shouts, “Why did you do this to me!?” His voice cracking as a sob wrecks through his body. “How could you leave me behind? You said you’d be here Y/N, we agreed we’d grow old together, we had plans! You’re supposed to be my wife right now, not in Valhalla four-thousand years ahead of me. You should be by my side, we should be talking about our extravagant honeymoon, talking about the future of little prince and princesses. You’re supposed to be here, with  _me._ ”

Sliding down the tree, he sits at it’s base with his face in his hands as tears stream down his face.

After a few minutes, a hand grasps his shoulder, causing him to look up quickly as he tries to jerk away.

Seeing the sad eyes of his mother he looks away, wiping the tears from his eyes, “What do you want?”

“To check on my son,” Frigga says softly, gently stroking his head.

“Why? So you can drag me back to go marry some random woman father has chosen?” He snaps, burying his face in his arms.

“No, because my child is in pain,” she replies.

“I’m an adult, I don’t need you to kiss it better mother,” he snaps backs.

“You’re an adult but it doesn’t mean you don’t need your mother,” she says slowly lowering herself to the ground and wrapping her arms around his shaking form.

His wall finally breaking, he leans into her embrace and lets the tears flow once again.

Frigga gently rocks him as she strokes his back until his cries seem to subside.

“She was supposed to be here,” he chokes out.

“She should have been,” Frigga nods. “But she gave up that for the one she loves to live. She wanted you to live more than herself.”

“I feel dead,” he mutters, his head laying on her shoulder.

“I know darling,” she whispers, still stroking his back. “It hurts, and I won’t lie to you, it will always hurt. But that hurt will dull, and become more manageable. And one day you will meet her again in Valhalla where she’s waiting for you.”

Nodding slowly, he exhales shakily and looks up at his mother’s face, “I love her.”

“And she loves you, she’ll watch over you,” she responds brushing his hair out of his face. “The sun will shine on you both again.”

-

Returning back to the palace with Frigga, they run into Thor at the gates who looks at Loki concerned.

“Are you alright brother?” He asks.

“I… will be eventually,” he says trying to sound confident.

“Good,” Thor smiles widely. “Because I need you to come with me and discuss something important.”

Feeling Thor’s subtle hint to go away, Frigga chuckles before patting both her boys on the arm and heading back into the palace.

“Come brother,” Thor states walking quickly through the gardens. “We have much planning.”

“Planning for what?” Loki asks obviously confused.

“Revenge,” he states simply.

“Revenge?”

“We’re going to Jotunheim to take out the bastards that killed Y/N,” Thor proclaims proudly.

“Are you insane brother?” Loki hisses, his eyes narrowing. “That is a death wish in itself, and she wouldn’t want that.”

“It was a death wish with only the four of you, but you and I alongside the Warrior Three and Sif will teach them a lesson to not take another Asgardian life,” he growls.

“Insane,” Loki mutters once again. Images of Y/N’s last moments running through his head once again.

“Fine,” Thor yells abruptly. “You stay in the palace and drink your way into Hel in mourning over her death, and I will get revenge for the loss of her life. I will show that she was loved and deserves a death for her death. I thought you loved her enough to understand that.”

“Don’t you ever,” Loki starts, advancing on Thor with his finger pointed toward him, his voice lower and more deadly. “Doubt my love for her. Ever. I will go with you. And we will get revenge.”

“There’s my brother,” Thor responds happily, clapping his back. “Get your armor, we leave at Dusk.”

 

**(Post Infinity War)**

Hitting the cobblestone ground beneath him, Loki groans as he pulls himself to his feet, gently wiping the dirt off his armor.

“Where in Odin’s name…” he begins as he looks around the garden he’s in. Up ahead the path he’s on leads to a gate with a palace not unlike that of the one he grew up in beyond that.

Following the path, he reaches the gates, pushing them open to reveal Frigga standing there waiting for him.

“My son,” she greets him warmly, her arms spread open.

Rushing to her side, he throws his arms around her and hugs her tight as his chin rests on her shoulder, “Mother I- I didn’t mean it I-“

“Shh,” she whispers patting the back of his head. “I know. And no matter what words you might spit out at me in anger, I’m still your mother and you’re still my son.”

“Thank you,” he responds, his eyes opening to see Odin standing back a few yards, a gentle smile on his face at their reunion.

“She’s been waiting for you,” he says. “We both had hoped it wouldn’t be this early, but you died a hero, my son.”

Nodding at Odin, his eyes flicker to a figure standing further back along the path. His breath catches in his throat, and his hold in his mother’s embrace stiffens.

A chuckle comes from Frigga, as she backs out of their hug and places a hand on his cheek, “Someone else has been waiting for you as well.”

Stepping away from his mother, Loki slowly approaches the figure in the distance. Once close enough, the first thing he sees is bright eyes. Those bright eyes.

Breaking out into a sprint, he races the rest of the distance between them, scooping Y/N up into his arms in a tight embrace.

“ _Darling_ ,” he emphasizes as he pulls back to look at her face. “Y/N.”

“The one and only,” she smiles up at him as he caresses her cheek. “My prince.”

“You said you’d always be there,” he says suddenly, the years of loneliness finally catching up with him again, his eyes burn as he blinks quickly.

“And I have been love,” she says softly. “Right here,” she places her hand over his heart. “I’ve watched you and been with you.”

“You’ve seen all I’ve done?” He asks, his heart dropping.

“You’ve gone through a lot,” she nods sadly. “Things I should have been there physically with you for. You’ve made bad choices, but you were also hurt, hurt very badly. I don’t judge that. Your entire balance was thrown off in a matter of months, and then you…” She looks down and squeezes him tightly.

“What?” He whispers, running a hand through her hair.

“You tried to kill yourself Loki,” she responds, her voice sounding more hoarse. “And then you ended up in the hands of a madman. And I could do nothing but watch.”

“But you were with me through it all? He asks.

“All of it,” she confirms. “I was linked to you when I died.” She carefully brushes away some of her own hair to show him a large scar on her temple.

“No…” he mutters, his hand going up to gently stoke the mark. “When he- when he did that to me he..” Loki tries to find the words but can’t as he stares at her in shock.

“I’ve felt your pain,” she nods leaning into his touch.

“I’m a monster,” he mutters, his eyes full of shame. “Look at what I’ve done.”

“You were hurt, and spinning wildly out of balance,” she answers gripping one of his hands. “You reacted, and you tried to protect yourself. But even in the end, after everything. You defended Asgard and her people, and you saved Thor at the expense of your own life. Life isn’t about being a hero or a villain Loki, it’s being the best version of yourself and protecting who and what you love selflessly in the end.”

“You gave up your life for me,” he replies softly.

“And my only regret was not being able to go home with you,” she responds, her eyes shining with pride. “But you didn’t need me to, you shined on your own.”

Cupping her face in both hands, he stares down into her eyes, his gaze flickering between them and her lips.

“Kiss me mischief god,” she grins looking into his eyes that light up at her words.

His lips press to hers gently at first, a shiver going down both their spines at the contact. Breaking the kiss to look at one another, he hungrily presses his lips to hers once again. Their lips move in sync as his hands drop down to her waist, pulling her in closer as her mouth opens, granting him entrance.

A soft moan leaves his throat as they break apart for air, his forehead pressed to hers, looking into the bright Y/E/C eyes he fell in love with.

The sound of someone clearing their throat causes the pair to glance over to see Frigga smacking Odin’s shoulder for interrupting them. And Y/N’s sweet laughter rings through his ears, as he finds himself laughing as well. Lifting her up by her waist he spins her around carelessly as she stares down at him with a big smile and eyes full of love.

And for the first time in a long time, he finally felt peace. Balance.  _Harmony_.  


End file.
